I'm in a bar, I'm sleeping in my car tonight, all good. Here I go.

So I had unprotected sex at the age of seven in 1968 in Elstenwick, Victoria. [Note: This appears to be a reference to the location of the abuse; she later describes it as gang rape and digital rape by two 14-year-old youths.]

I managed growing up. Mum said I was interfered with. By promising myself that when I was a big girl I would track these people—all these men—down and confront them for what they did to me.

I told on them at the time. That was at a dinner table with three youths, the mother and the father. The mother had taken me to look after me after the death of my father and my mother was in hospital. She did not look after me—she sent me with the three youths every day. I was their honeymoon child.

I haven't gone into it in depth, but I suffered abuse at home as well. Each time I told, and the abuse was able to stop. So it was just a dangerous life. I've confronted my siblings about that. Some have taken responsibility in a fantastic fashion; some haven't. They meet their churchgoers and they say, "I'll pray for you," and all that.

So I met the namesake nephew of the priest who married my parents—him and his lawyer in Toorak, in the boardroom—after I'd reported to the police located in the hopeless. VicPol, pardon me. They should have—if they were third-income investigators—they would have offered me a pretext call. Perfect opportunity when I'm coming forward, you know, probably five decades later.

So I met with him and his lawyer in about—I’ve got the date at home, I can clarify—in about 2016. After an hour they threatened me, so I sued him. Unsuccessfully becoming the test case to challenge the statute of limitations law change after the Royal Commission held in Australia that was fundamentally called for boys.

There are more girl victims than boy victims, so institutional is 20%. That meant that the Royal Commission did not investigate 80%, which is incest, stepfathers—whatever. The list just goes on. You know, we've got to stop being shocked; it's really common. They don't have to be pedophiles to do damage.

Mine were both 14; I was seven. So two youths twice my age. One of them has taken responsibility and one of them has taken my money.

After I was threatened, I did what I could to highlight the situation. I sued him. And of course there's no point in suing someone who's not wealthy. He was a Xavier College student like Silvani when the offending occurred. He was in Form 2; I was in Grade 2.

After the abuse, I dropped out of school aged 12, mid-term. It was my second secondary school. When my mother was 21 at Colac High, she had taught HSC, Matriculation Leading, VCE, Year 12, at the age of 21. Father John Conlon had deemed that she was a waste of talent down there and got her to come back to Melbourne. So she was university educated, obviously a woman who believed in education for girls.

As a result of this action, because he had the money, he just kept appealing. He appealed to the county court to get the case thrown out. A county court woman judge looked at it and ruled that we go to trial. At that stage, the other offender, Eugene Samuel Lovett—a juvenile delinquent Aboriginal who the government couldn't control—had not been found.

So she ruled on just the evidence in front of her that the case go to trial. He did not like that. So he appealed to the court of appeal in two parts: one, to get it thrown out; and the other, to get his identity hidden. I couldn't afford to fight both and lose both. So I just fought to get him into court. They were only 14. I had empathy for that.

But as Andrew Rule said, a 14-year-old can be shaving. That sent chills through me.

So I've actually had a massive win. It just does not feel like it. Because the judges said it would be an abuse of power if my case came into court. They said it was too long ago and ruled in his favour, but put their names online. And he was threatening me—if anybody heard that I had said he raped me—that they would break me.

So in actual fact, the fact their judges put their names online, the judges' sight unseen, also gave me $50,000. Now, it's no win, no fee. But looking back, I've paid all these court fees. No win, no fees—a fair dinkum joke. All the lawyers and the law firms, they were just ambulance chasers. And now they're suing one another. Some of them didn't ever take a case to court. They just settled out of court.

Why would you sue someone for rape? That's what I say.

Regarding other advocates and feminists and people with a platform—of which I had none because I wasn't active on social media—the only one that I can really give credit to is Virginia Dufresne Roberts, who signed my petition that ultimately failed for redress.

I still have not opened that letter, John. I'm pretty determined I'm going to send it back to them saying this person could be deceased.

So all the others I would say that have platforms, huge platforms, huge voices—every time they squeak one word for Grace Tame, difficult, she gets more spotlight for that than what I've had in 10 years for my situation.

She also obviously has a foundation. I contacted them. And all they would have to do would be share it or stand up against the statute of limitations failed law change, and they have not.

The same goes for Loud Fence, which are based here in Ballarat, where I'm based, for over 40 years. It just gets down to personalities, politics, and the woman that runs that charity, I was told, was territorial. So she obviously saw me as a threat. So their genuine goals are just not genuine.

What I've had to put up with, I have not had one Ballarat survivor of clergy abuse that have had payouts. Not one of them have supported me or what I stood up for.

And the joke of it is, if they hadn't had the Royal Commission, where they then changed the statute of limitations laws because there was an average of 33 years, I could not have sued him. So they ultimately sent me up for a fail and then couldn't give two hoots about it.

The other Elstenwick cases—Nicole Meyer, Darcy, and her other sister—I'm just not concentrating at the moment, but they were also sexually abused in Elstenwick. So I call myself the other Elstenwick case.

So they had civil payouts and the school board should have been marching the headmistress down to the authorities when she's facing over 70 charges. Instead, they held her free in the middle of the night. So they get to go to court, they get a civil payout.

It was ruled that criminally for Nicole, she had to bear a not guilty, whereas her sister's got guilty pleas and Malka Leifer went to jail. So that was obviously very difficult for Nicole to deal with. I don't know, I don't understand the law. I assume it had something to do with her age, the age of consent.

But she's online all the time and I've met her—she's a lovely person. I actually sent her a copy of You Be The Judge documentary, which was funded—the edit was funded by Colin McKenna. You know, out of 100 men I speak to, I find one good man and definitely that was Colin McKenna who just kept telling me not to give up. He bred and owned last year's Caulfield Melbourne Cup winner, but unfortunately his death had preceded that beautiful, wonderful event.

And Nicole's online all the time and like I physically posted her a DVD of You Be The Judge before it had been released on YouTube. And as an advocate who has a large platform and attends the National Survivors Days as a guest speaker and that—I'm just incredibly disappointed that she's never said anything in my defence.

So Grace Tame—I approached her for the documentary update and she said yes, she'd do the introduction. That could be done on Zoom in five minutes and I was delighted because I've got Grace Tame and I've got the Bishop funding the update and she was looking for an out and she used the Bishop as an out and I said well if it's between you and the Bishop, I'll ditch the Bishop.

I didn't say I'd ditch his money, but I would have ditched the Bishop to get support from Grace Tame and she just walked away and she hasn't even shared the documentary and the Prime Minister calls her difficult and she gets all this publicity. I know it's good and bad, but I just think if you're a genuine advocate about child sexual abuse—like I was seven and it was gang rape and digital rape and other sexual assaults. It was pretty severe.

So the Melbourne Magistrates Court has gifted me over $6,000 worth of therapy and yoga which is incredibly frustrating given that my trauma is now financial. I paid him over $100,000. The bill was $120,000. I sent him a cheque for $100,000.10. Had he not cashed it John, I would have done nothing else.

When he took my money, I went and found Eugene, hired a filmmaker, funded a documentary. Whereas the other Elstenwick case, they got their documentary made by SBS. I had to fund and pay everything myself. Literally everything bar Colin McKenna's edit of You Be The Judge and the Bishop. He doesn't know me from the queues. It was pretty awesome, but of course it made all the Catholics and my in-laws hate my guts. They reckon I've robbed the plate.

But I had no support hardly from anywhere else. You, Chris Pianto, Graham Livingston, and Dean and Ali. Dean Fargo loves me because his wife with his support and myself have been the two sort of flag bearers.

But other than you, Graham who constantly keeps touch on Messenger, Chris Pianto who was just so wonderful—but I felt so special with Chris, but he was like that to all the survivors. Just an amazing, and it took him to shoot himself in the leg and over three decades to get any justice. And then he had cancer and before he knew it he was deceased, but at least his wife Jenny was going to be okay. They say stress kills. Well, he was in stress for probably three or four decades. Worried that his brother starting at St Joseph's Geelong was going to end up the same way as he did with this pedophile teacher.

So when I got the AMA award in COVID, which was, thank you, it was pretty amazing because the year before it had been shared by 10 doctors and professors. And given that I'm getting that award when I've left school at 12 midterm is pretty amazing.

The head of the AMA said to me, because the justice system doesn't work, the medical system gets flooded with the trauma and he said we would rather have a fence at the top of the cliff than an ambulance at the bottom.

So I really love what you're doing and as you know, John, it comes at a huge price in all areas. This has killed my marriage. At 41 years, I'm actually here today because I've called out domestic violence and therefore I'm not invited to my niece's wedding. It's just wrong.

So my in-laws have shafted me because they're churchgoers and they reckon like I've damaged the church, I've robbed the bishop. I've done nothing to the church. I merely stand up for children who by their size and tender years are not very powerful.

And as we can see, since I've been doing this work, we've had the church, the crescendo effect now right up to the leader of the free world and all these multi-millionaires like Bill Gates who are raping, sacrificing and eating babies and they literally can't get no satisfaction and none of them have been held accountable. The only one held accountable is the female enabler who's been in jail and it's just there for the whole world to see.

So I can understand why they wouldn't let me into court but had they realised that I could go to court, I would have had a court doorstop settlement and I still would have been pretty respectful because he was only 14 and because he's a public figure and because he's worried about being called out for rape but now I'm quite unconcerned and his daughter has blocked me on Twitter.

It took her a while. I think first of all when I got on, she got off and then she came back so I started posting on her page and she blocked me so I need some people on X to screenshot her friends if possible so that I can tag them because I'm going to just start calling him out.

I'm trying to do a Hannah House I'm asset rich and cash poor and I have no superannuation and now my marriage is over and honestly I owe my husband $50,000 because he's always worked hard. Why should he be out of profit because the other guy lied? Yeah, anyway, that's a lot.

Any questions you've got I'm happy to answer. If you want me to try and go to email it's just so frustrating I just don't get it done. I'm just so sick of administration. There's a lot there for you John.

See how you go and yeah, well done you. You've never ever walked away from giving up and it's quality work that we're doing.

Children by their size and tender years cannot protect themselves and they shouldn't be expected to. It's their job to have a happy, carefree, innocent childhood. We all only get one unless some bastard steals it.

So knowledge is power and we need to give them knowledge and their parents knowledge. Trust no one. None of my children—I didn't outsource any parenting. No sleepovers, no school camps, no kindergarten, no daycare, no regrets.

There you go. I'll leave you be for a while now. Any questions hit me up. Thanks for what you do John. I appreciate you.

Return to the The Blue•Print - Survivors

We have talked with Marita previously: Have you watched the Marita Murphy story? ''You be the Judge''

And: Marita Murphy and John Brown - what are they talking about?

Journeys for Justice: The Marita Murphy story

... and then Marita came back into my life bringing smiles

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