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The inability of a child to thrive in a Constitutionally protected God based perpetual threat and rape culture is not a fault of the child; however it does become their odious responsibility upon reaching adulthood. The Christian religion at it's core is a toxic mechanism whereby intergenerational trauma has been kept alive, active and deeply embedded in each new generation over the past 2,000+ years.

The FAQyMe gene #278


<<..CONFIDENTIAL..>> For the personal eyes of Justice Peter McClellan only.

Saturday, 31 August 2019 6:51:13 AM

originally titled :- Spring 1920 - Kathleen Rose Mackin - Title updated 25 March 2021.

-------- Original Message --------
Subject: 	<<..CONFIDENTIAL..>> For the personal eyes of Justice Peter McClellan only.
Date: 	Sun, 16 Mar 2014 16:18:44 +1000
To: 	Solicitor- RCIRCSA 

For the personal attention of Justice Peter McClellan

Justice McClellan,

I am writing directly to you as I have a number of serious matters that
in my opinion brings the Royal Commission into disrepute, as well these
matters may have cast doubts and aspersions as to the veracity of my
story as I gave it to the Royal Commission.

I write to demand that these matters be brought to your attention so that I
may seek a hearing so that these matters may be cleared up as soon as
possible. I have openly and publicly stood my reputation behind the Royal
Commission in its endeavor to bring us justice; this is something that I
can not continue with until these matters are resolved in an appropriate

When I read the web site of the Royal Commission it stated that I could
speak to a Commissioner of the Royal Commission in one of 3 ways.
Speaking directly to someone in authority has been a priority and a
desire of mine since the day I sat on my mothers' lap by the kitchen
fire in my home as she held me wrapped in a blanket and asked me to tell
her what had happened to me. I had been violently raped by Kevin
O'Donnell and beaten, kicked and had my foot severely injured, despite
my mother bathing me I was still bleeding and sobbing.

We talked and I told her that what they had been doing was wrong and
that somebody should tell them. She hugged me and cried a little as
she told me I was not the first or the last of her children to be raped or
abused by rapist and abusive Catholic clergy.

I told my mother I would do that no matter what it took me. She hugged
me and told me perhaps sometime in the future as they were far too
powerful and connected and controlled too many thing that it was
impossible just now. I was around 8 years of age at that time.

She told me she had tried on other occasions and that she would try
again for me and she said she would keep trying. She did and actually
had a number of small wins though I am not conversant with the whole
story of that. I told her I would find the right people to talk to; I 
have been on that journey with urgency since the arrival of my son.

The night before she died, my mother had called all her children in for
a conversation. My conversation with my mother on that night was
predominantly on the topic of our conversation in my childhood that I
have mentioned above, we both knew that she was dying.

We made a promise to each other. Mine was to renew my childhood promise
to her. Hers was to promise if there was any possible way to see that
justice would be done for myself and the others who had been exploited
and abused and raped by Catholic clergy then she would get back to me
and the others as if there was an after life she would continue in that.

She hugged me and said she couldn't do it any other way simply because
she was a mother and that is what mothers do for their children.

The man she went to to assist her was kicked and beaten and took 8 days
to die after he again attempted to intervene on a younger sisters behalf 
some years later after she had been molested by another Catholic clergyman.

I have many more reasons why I wish to give my testimony under the
stated and published policies and procedures and I say here to you that
the Royal Commission has not upheld its side of its publicly stated
bargain. In fact it has acted to stymie and to deny me my right. That is
one of the major purposes as to why I write this email to you.

Due to some of the quirks of human nature when having to discuss highly
emotional matters with strangers I chose to do my submission via
telephone as it provided me with the best environment possible as well
it provided and added a sense of security, I was at home and did not
have to travel to and back from Brisbane - past disastrous experiences
re this can be added here - (*1 My meeting with now officer of the Royal
Commission Ruth Baker *2 My meeting with Jason Parkinson and associate.)

My experience of telling my story to a Royal Commissioner did not take
place though I was contacted by an officer of the Royal Commission whom
I learned later was a substitute and that she or others would transcribe
my conversation with her. This transcript was to then be passed on to a
Royal Commissioner to read. Clearly this was not the procedure described
in your literature not was I clearly advised that there would be a 
deviation from procedure in my circumstance.

During an earlier conversation with Bronwyn I had spoken expressly on
the topic of speaking with a Commissioner. I explained clearly to her a
process that I recognized and understood would be traumatic for me. It
appears now that I was duped into providing information to someone on
the basis of trust and respect and that somewhere in that process I have
found an enemy who chose to do precisely as I described and explained
would be triggering for me. The Royal Commission did precisely what I
asked them not to while they were in the full knowledge and
understanding that to act as they did would be detrimental and harmful
to me and I have been injured wrongfully by that.

Learning of this in hindsight is a very unpleasant experience as it
triggers many previous occasions where such an abuse of trust has openly
and blatantly taken place with no explanation offered as to the change
of procedure - added to that the content on the web site has not been
updated to inform others that this may also occur to them if they choose
to give their testimony via telephone. In my part of the world we call that
a fraud and a sham; a bogus operation that is despised and hated due to
its patent unfairness and its failure to follow the stated procedure. I
and others find it to be more than offensive given the need of the Royal
Commission to be seen to be fair and honest with those of us they deal

If the Royal Commission understands so little about trauma and the
experience and how to deal with those who have experienced it then it
is my opinion that if you continue on the path your are currently
following then it will be the progenitor of more unintended suicides.

My experience with the Royal Commission has been one that I would
usually associate with the cultural differences encountered when
dealing with the Catholic Church only in this instance it is worse
simply because the Royal Commission is seen and looks on itself as
the protector and as a safe contact for survivors.

Over recent months I have been coming into contact with an increasing
number of survivors complaining of similar experiences. While I understand
the effort and the work put in by the Royal Commission in an attempt to
ensure that its workers are safe and protected from the trauma it appears
that little if any consideration has been directed towards those of us who
have been asked to relate the horrific aspects of our experience to the
Royal Commission.

For most of us this is an experience that we would normally be very
careful in our conversations with others. Many have learned how to
safely converse with others and they do that by talking as survivors
where they relate to one another the horror in digestible chunks in
association with more than 90% of any such discussion being around
their survival and how they achieved that or how they escaped
(what some in your circles may refer to as debriefing).

The current methods of the Royal Commission again in my own opinion
appears to have taken its advice from those who have no to little
understanding of this experience of survivors or of their own traumatic
experiences as children - given the current circumstance the Royal
Commission with the best of intentions sets many people up for months
long recuperation after - those who have little or no understanding
of the biological processes of pattern matching, brain plasticity,
culture, trauma recall and re-experience can end up in psychiatric
wards or take their own lives as a result of the social ignorance of
this very real aspect of our lives.

I have come back to this document several times as I process my
experience and put much of it into perspective; on this occasion I
come back to it to describe a little of human nature. When providing
this document to other survivors for their review and input I get a
massive "Yes" response as well as additional helpful information -
therein lays the difference as when you and/or others working for the
Royal Commission get to read this we understand that it will generate
an almost horrified opposite response - both sides can not be right.
When the response from the Royal Commission is to follow the habits
and reactions of the Catholic and other Churches and individuals by
claiming we are off our medication or in need of psychiatric services
simply as a result of the inability of the "professional" to process
and understand correctly and in reality it then falls to us to wonder
who genuinely needs those types of services and just as so many survivors
who have yet to contact the Royal Commission they make an evaluation
to determine the safety of the services and methods on offer from the
Royal Commission.

Perhaps some part of the answer to that comes from the notion as I
understand it that the Royal Commission intends to promote and advertise
for more to come forward. When I and others have had to journey across
the country looking for a suitable counselor based on certain criteria
it appears that around one in a hundred is suitable and with almost no
exception we observe that those counselors and their organisations failed
to obtain funding to provide the minimum needs and requirements of
survivors in such circumstances.

Given the current toxic circumstances it is my opinion that your
advertising will attract a segment though not a large one when I consider
the number of those I am aware of who have yet to observe that the Royal
Commission process is a safe one for them to travel and will forever
remain outside such a toxic process.

Others will be driven by their biological need to provide safety and
protection to their and others children - just how many of those will
make the ultimate sacrifice as the current system must fail them.

Why do they do this? Because of their experience as survivors they
understand the risk to their lives and to the lives of their children
when they encounter profound abuse of trust brought about by inexperience
and a lack of understanding. I personally can not under the present
circumstances attempt to encourage anyone who is still yet in doubt as
to their willingness to attempt communication with the Royal Commission
as it is a life threatening situation for them if it goes wrong. The
many experiences related to me of the failures and my own experience of
those failures simply adds convincing evidence that this is a process no
matter how it is put is a dangerous situation that they are putting
themselves into.

Others will find it so destructive that suicide becomes for them the most
attractive option as they know and realize the reality of their situation
in that $45 million has been injected into support services and no matter
how hard they try and how wide they look little if any of that money or
services is available to them.

This problem has existed for generations and rather than being addressed
it is being continued by the Royal Commission at the cost of the lives of
those who have been abused previously.

When viewed from my perspective the experience of my private submission
has been not only toxic it has been damaging to me and as I see it all
that is both unwarranted and unnecessary and that further that it
pollutes and degrades not only the environment but it casts doubts on to
all those who work hard at the Royal Commission.

There were aspects within that conversation where the listener reacted
and began to caution me. In response I stated that I was on topic and on
point; I was allowed to continue after what appeared to be a hurried
conversation with Bronwyn who was sitting in on the conversation. After
3 hours I was attempting to conclude the conversation at her request. I
had one brief topic which I had raised on that morning with Bronwyn when
she called and asked me if I could give my statement that afternoon. She
had agreed that I would be able to add that as a part of my private
submission. I was not able to do this and I was left almost shouting at
the last to Bronwyn to please add this as the woman hung up the phone.

I was left stunned for days after this as I was unable to ingest what
had happened. I experienced serious flashbacks to an extent that I had
not since my early childhood. I re experienced many traumas where in the
past my trust had been abused in similar ways. I was unable to process
this on my own for quite some period and it is only now that I feel I am
able to describe these things here for the first time since those events.

It has not been an easy process as an abuse of trust at this level is
shocking at the deepest possible levels in a human being. I am trying
not to dwell on those aspects at the moment so I will endeavor to talk
of those other things that I find at issue.

I had recorded the conversation for my personal records, as an account
to validate the veracity of my own statements and for workplace health
and safety reasons as well as for training and education purposes and it
is my intention to consider the many options open to me in that regard.

Considering that 3 hours of conversation were to be transcribed your web
site states that I may be given the opportunity to read the transcript.
I was not offered this option and as a result I now doubt the veracity
of the transcription and forthwith ask for that opportunity to be opened
up for me so that I may check each and every word of the transcript
against my recording so I can ensure myself of its accuracy.

I am aware of the reputation of the Royal Commission and I sincerely do
not wish to bring it into disrepute and in fact if I look at it squarely
I feel that the Royal Commission would gather back many others who have
been disappointed with their experience if they were to be open about this.
I feel that the reputation of the Royal Commission is something that I
would like to honor so that my son and the children of society will get a
very clear message that they can and will be treated equally and fairly by
the highest authority - this also goes to my promise to my mother.

Recently I learned of a 2 and a half or so hour public meeting with the
CEO of the Royal Commission at Ben's Alibi in Brisbane among other
things and wondered how common was that. I wondered if the conversation
was about the coffee or the dealings of the Royal Commission or would it
have been a conversation about boating or bird watching or the recent
finding of hundreds of new planets around far distant suns.

Considering the ease of wiling away highly paid time over coffee I
thought that I would not want to impose so deeply on the Royal
Commission let alone ask to meet in public as I see that as something
that simply should not be done because it simply is so unfair to those
of us that  see people who have chats over coffee claim to speak on our
behalf and the reality of that is about as distant as the further most
planet recently discovered. In fairness I feel an hour on the phone with
you would give me an opportunity to fulfill many obligations that I have
held dearly; some now for more than 57 years.

I would accept that telephone conversation as fulfillment of my right to
the proper hearing that I have sought pro actively over the past 20
years or so here in Toowoomba and other places. Outside that hour I
may seek to discuss with someone to advise me if I may be able to
seek redress from the Royal Commission or to at least see proper
changes and for it to become inclusive of the knowledge gained by so
many survivors.

I would like to spend that hour on topics that I choose and I am more
than happy to allow extra time for you to give me some answers to those
issues I have raised above. I would also like to encourage you to talk in
a similar way with some other very knowledgeable and qualified survivors
that I can introduce you to. I believe you will find their understanding 
as to the "Why" question to be compelling, plausible and backed up by research
and scientific inquiry. If that is not possible then I would like to ask 
to make arrangements so that I can bring a number of world class scientists and
researches with specific knowledge in this regard via an International
hookup over the Internet so that they can share their knowledge and
experience with the Royal Commission and the people of Australia.

I apologize for my style of writing and my use of whatever dictionary is
installed on my computer. My education was severely interrupted in grade
3 and it has only been in the past 8 or 10 years that I have taken on
the task of learning to write, speak and to  further educate myself after
such a deplorable and morally and ethically bereft Catholic education
so that I may fulfil the promise I made to my mother and so that I may
fulfill my natural obligation towards my own child and hopefully his
children. I ask that  you accept my humanness in this.


John Brown

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Surprise yourself -

"This is a matter for the church and I respect the internal judgements of the church. I don't stand outside the church and provide them with public lectures in terms of how they should behave. I've noted carefully what his Holiness has said in the United States. Obviously that was a source of great comfort and healing in the United States. I'm like all Australians very much looking forward to what the Pope has to say here in Australia as well, as I am to my own conversation with the Pope later this morning." Kevin Rudd, Prime Minister of Australia, 17 July 2008. more

If you found this information to be of assistance please don't forget to donate so that we can extend these information pages which are focused on providing knowledge and information to survivor/victims on their Human Rights with justice, compassion and empathy at the fore along with sound knowledge of Human Biology and Psychology, Human Evolution and Neuroscience. Information is not provided as legal or professional advice; it is provided as general information only and requires that you validate any information via your own legal or other professional service providers.

Look for these other FAQyMe Gene educated, secular, social-inclusion sites.

Clergy Abuse Action - repurposed || Molested Catholics by the Million || Captain Obvious - My Broken Society || A first in Secular Australia for Children - It's not Rocket Science || The Blue Print - It's OH so Obvious - repurposed || The GCAC - The Global Clergy Abuse Crisis - repurposed || TFYQA Think for Yourself, Question Authority || XT3 Molested Catholic courtesy of George Pell and babbling Benny || Defending the Human Rights of Catholic Adults and Children Trauma in Religion || The FAQyMe Gene - The FAQ Why Me Gene blog

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Wednesday, 22 June 2022 - I may not have this down syntax, word and letter perfect or with absolute precision in every aspect; however time and the evidence will show that I am closer to the truth than any religion has been or will likely be.
Let history be the standard by which that is measured.

Youtube - listen to Commissioner Bob Atkinson get it wrong - again
The Commissioner informs us that the clergy sexual abuse issue was all over and that it had only been a small statistical glitch around the year 2000. History shows this to have been a display of absolute ignorance on the issue ...

Makarrata : a better future for our children based on justice and self-determination. The Uluru Statement from the Heart. See Yours, mine and Australia's children. I acknowledge the Traditional People and their Ownership of Australia.

  trauma informed     human rights     justice     failed institutions     UN Convention on Human Rights     Rights of the Child and a Bill of Rights for Australia     future     evidence     resilience     not providing or representing a secular Australia     autodidact     religion     human rights     rights of the child     justice for survivors of abuse by religious   

Hegemony: The authority, dominance, and influence of one group, nation, or society over another group, nation, or society; typically through cultural, economic, or political means.


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Were you like so many others born into a constitutionally protected God based death and rape culture?

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